Archive for September, 2010

My mother-in-law spoiled my wedding

My mother-in-law is literally a nightmare. When I was getting married, I was so afraid of her that I gave into all of her demands. Looking back, I had a dress that I didn’t really like [had to be super-conservative] a room full of her friends, a band that she chose [awful] and a zillion other little things that I really didn’t want. That, and during the ceremony, my bridesmaids came to me to tell me she was crying in the bathroom. Oh, and did I mention she boycotted the brunch the next day? If I had known her better, I would have realized that nothing would make her happy.

Common Problem. We hear stories all the time about brides and grooms that are blissfully happy until the families [on either side] get involved with the wedding planning and details. Your ability to manage that situation may predict your ability to navigate family politics together in the years to come.

Have you ever dated a guy who didn’t like his parents and you meet them and you think, “why doesn’t he like them. They are such wonderful people?” Then, six months into the relationship, you realize that they are completely awful but by that time you have become “friends” with them and it is too hard to get rid of them?

Here is our itty-bitty piece of advice on this one: If you love your bride/groom, trust their judgement and follow their lead. If they think their parents are a nightmare, chances are their opinion is a lot more fact based than yours will be. Don’t try to be the bridge-builder or healer or you will wind up sorely disappointed, as this bride found out.

So how to deal with your mother-in-law? (more…)


September 14, 2010 at 3:36 pm Leave a comment

I Saved Money in the Wrong Places

When I started planning my wedding I basically just went through and asked for everything on my wish list. At some point, it hit me like a ton of bricks how fast all of the bills were piling up. I couldn’t belive how much money I was spending and I went into panic mode cutting things left and right.

We all get there.

You are planning you wedding and you just lose sight of everything you are spending because it is all indifferent places: the photographer, the florist, the hotel, the welcome baskets, etc. When you sit down and add it up, you basically have a heart attack. It’s kind of like getting your credit card at the end of the month, you don’t see one charge for more than $150 but yet your bill is $1,500 and you can’t figure out how you did it. (more…)

September 13, 2010 at 6:24 pm Leave a comment

We didn’t take enough time to plan our honeymoon

I don’t know exactly how it happened, but somewhere along the way we became so consumed with our wedding planning that we forgot to plan our honeymoon. At the last minute, we booked to go to Tahiti thinking ‘it is February in the US so summer in Tahiti so that will be good.’ When we arrived at the hotel, it was half empty, half closed and hotter than you can possibly imagine. Thankfully, we were headed off to New Zealand and that saved the trip or it would have been a total bust!

To me, this is totally understandable. The wedding details become so all consuming that planning the honeymoon actually becomes somewhat of an afterthought. You figure that you will pick a great hotel and then everything will take care of itself from there. Even if you don’t have a lot of time to plan the honeymoon, make sure you at least cover these few important points before you go. (more…)

September 2, 2010 at 3:37 pm Leave a comment